For the person who has come to faith in Jesus Christ, finding a mate who shares a similar commitment and spiritual walk is vitally important!  Since II Corinthians 6:14 says, “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers,” some have concluded that if a person is a Christian, he/she should only marry another Christian. It does mean that, but I think it runs deeper. If Paul simply wanted to convey that two people were heaven bound, he could have used a different word-picture. He could have used a corral or field of oxen- creatures in proximity with each other. Instead, he uses an agricultural picture of a yoke, one that would have been placed upon the necks of two oxen as they pulled a plow or agricultural tool. The yoke would require two things of the oxen. 1- That they walk in the same direction. 2- That they walk at a similar pace. What happens when two yoked oxen walk at different speeds? It’s not pretty!

“He believes in a higher power.” “Oh, she’ll come to faith after we marry.” “He says he’ll come to church with me.” Those things may happen, but they are not guaranteed. Marrying someone who doesn’t share your faith in Christ is saying, “God, I think I can handle this one on my own, thanks.” But even if your friend knows Christ, is there a hunger to grow spiritually?

You first need to understand your own spiritual walk to see if being yoked together is going to work. Is God my delight? Am I growing in my understanding of His infinite love for me? Have I committed to follow Him daily? Do I believe and trust in His Word? Notice, I didn’t ask if you are perfect, all of us fall short. But yearning for a deeper walk with God will enhance a marriage, not hinder it.

Has your friend received God’s free gift of forgiveness through faith in Christ? If so, what impact does it have upon his/her daily life? Does he believe what the Bible says, or is there a more culturally correct worldview that’s held? Does she have a tendency to compromise when it’s convenient? Is he like the seed that fell among the rocks in Matthew 13: 20, 21- quick growth, but no deep root system?

Time and again, I’ve spoken with people, who thought they were marrying a Christian, but once wedding rings were exchanged, spiritual interests fell like a rock. That’s why it’s so difficult to start a relationship with someone who subsequently receives Christ. You don’t know if the interest expressed thereafter is really about the Lord, or about one’s interest in you. You may need to see what your friend’s relationship with God would look like if you were not in the picture. Would the person attend church without your presence or prompting? Would the person walk with the Lord, or walk from the Lord if you were no longer involved?

Advertisements