Warmer temperatures, blooming flowers, and baseball. It must be spring time. For many people it is time to get rid of the junk that accumulated over the winter months. It is time to get in the garden and do some weeding.

This could also be a good time to do some tidying up with marital relationships. Pull out some of those weeds in your marriage that are preventing you from having a beautiful relationship with your spouse.

Two common “weeds” in marriages are arguing and busyness.

Many couples let conflict  lead to arguing. Unhealthy communication skills can be a major contributor to this. Many spouses may become defensive of their actions when the other is trying to express how their behavior is affecting them. Sometimes the spouse puts the other in the position to do this as they are blaming them. However, if the spouse is able to express how they feel and the other spouse is able to listen–without becoming defensive–often a resolution to the problem can be agreed upon without yelling, screaming, etc.

It is important to remember than a person is never wrong for feeling the way they do, so do not try to explain why they should not feel that way. For the person who is upset, it is important to remember that they may not have necessarily tried to make you feel the way you do.

Cleaning out busyness seems like a good idea, but schedules fill up pretty quickly and time slips away. So, instead of trying to squeeze in time with your spouse in the cracks, schedule them in. Make sacred time with a spouse that is unbreakable. This shows your spouse you are serious about spending time with them.

These are just a few “weeds” that could be pulled up out of the garden this spring. I hope you and your spouse are able to do pull up the “weeds” of arguing and busyness this spring so the flowers of your relationships can blossom.