Mindfulness is a state of being aware. It is a process of intentionally observing our surroundings in the moment, with engaged awareness and free of judgment. Mindfulness is not a passive state and may require practice to be in the moment. Left to itself the mind wanders through all kinds of thoughts — including thoughts expressing anger, craving, depression, revenge, self-pity, etc. As we indulge in these kinds of thoughts we reinforce those emotions in our hearts and cause ourselves to suffer. By purposefully directing our awareness away from such thoughts and towards some “anchor” we decrease their effect on our lives and we create instead a space of freedom where calmness and contentment can grow.

downloadAs a parent, being mindful allows us to choose a skillful response instead of just reacting. Being mindful can help a child regulate his/her emotions, be more focused, and to make better decisions. Practicing mindfulness with your child is a great way to spend time to together and to teach your child to be aware of their experience and to recognize when their attention has wandered. Why not get your toolbox of ideas ready? Here are some ideas to get you started.

 

Tool #1 Focus on your body: Do a body scan. Wiggle your toes. Let your arms and legs be like spaghetti. Feel your breath go in and out. Depending on the age of the child, you might say, “Pretend your belly is a balloon and watch it expand. Then blow out a noisy breath through the lips. How does that feel?” You might use a breathing buddy. Put a stuffed animal on their belly and watch the rise and fall of their buddy.

Tool #2 Focus on an object. What is the color? Can you touch it? Is it cold? If you have a smooth pebble or marble, feel the coolness. Then hold it in your hand a few minutes. Notice the change in temperature. If you are eating, focus on the food. Is it cold or hot? Is it sweet?

Tool # 3 Focus on sounds. Ask your child what sounds he/she can hear? Is the clock ticking? Can you hear the wind? Use a bell or sound on your phone or just tap lightly on the table. Ask the child to listen and let you know when the sound stops.

Tool #4 Focus on love. Ask your child to name all the people who love them. Mommy, Daddy, brother, sister, grandparent, dog or cat. You can also think of things the child loves about others. What do you like about your friends? Ask what you can do to be kind to the ones who love you.

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  1. Don’t deny that you’ve been hurt. Forgiving isn’t denying.
  2. Make a decision to forgive others. (Luke 17:3-5)
  3. Don’t seek revenge or repay evil for evil. Let God handle it. (I Peter 3:9)
  4. Pray the Lord will release any anger inside you. (Eph 4:26-27, 31)
  5. Pray for those who have hurt you. (Matt 5:44)

–biblestudyplanet.com

 

Paducah, KY, Monday, May 07, 2018

Christian Counseling Center is A Professional Caring Ministry Since 1986

Roger Thompson, Executive Director, is pleased to announce that Kimberly Rowe, MEd, LPCA will be joining our staff.  She will be accepting all types of referrals for mental and behavioral problems.

Kim obtained a Bachelor of Business Administration in Management from the University of Texas at Arlington, TX. She then obtained her Masters of Education with a focus on Mental Health Counseling from the Lindsey Wilson School of Professional Counseling College at Columbia KY. Since 2015 she has worked with clients at Recovery Works to provide group and individual counseling regarding Anxiety, Anger Management and substance dependence.

Kim is a member of the American Counseling Association (ACA) and Kentucky Counseling Association (KCA). She is a Volunteer Tutor and Women’s Support Group Facilitator at the Ninth Street Church of Christ in Paducah. She also teaches life skills to 3rd through 5th graders from local elementary schools. She is an avid gardener and enjoys spending time with her husband and two children.

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Kim says, “Beginning again is an opportunity not always given. I am especially excited to work with individuals and families that have made the decision to begin again. I look forward to assisting you in acquiring and utilizing the tools in navigating life’s challenges and moving forward.”

 Appointments can be made by calling the Christian Counseling Center at 270-442-5738. You may also visit us on the web at www.ccchope.com.

Summertime is a great time for families to spend more time together.

Close families don’t happen by accident, they happen on purpose.  If you want a close family, you have to work at it.  Here are a few suggestions to help you get started.

  1. Let each family member pick a day to be “their” day. Circle those days on the calendar and put the family member’s name on the date.  On that day they are to have their favorite meal and choose an activity which they want the entire family to participate in.
  2. Turn off all electrical items that can interrupt (TV, stereo, phone, etc.) and have the entire family play a game together.pexels-photo-279008.jpeg
  3. Have each family member design and make a card for other members of the family in which thoughts and feelings of appreciation are expressed.
  4. Begin a contest to see who can deliver the most hugs in a certain period of time.
  5. Spend the evening looking at family photographs together.
  6. Invite someone you know that is recently widowed to your house to share a family meal.
  7. Send a thank you card in the mail to a family member thanking them for something they have done for you or the family.
  8. Even if it requires getting up early, sit down and have breakfast together.
  9. Let each family member tell their most unforgettable family memory.
  10. Declare a family clean-up day. Work together inside or outside the house instead of assigning separate choirs.

These ideas are just a few of the suggestions in “30 Days to a Closer Family” by David Johnson, M.S.W. and Scott Bonk, M.S.

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Research shows that supportive relationships are good for our mental and physical health. However, dealing with difficult people and maintaining ongoing negative relationships is actually detrimental to our health.

The following are tips for dealing with difficult people who are in your life, for better or for worse:

  1. In dealing with difficult people, don’t try to change the other person; you will only get into a power struggle, cause defensiveness, invite criticism, or otherwise make things worse. It also makes you a more difficult person to deal with.
  2. Change your response to the other person; this is all you have the power to change. For example, don’t feel you need to accept abusive behavior. You can use assertive communication to draw boundaries when the other person chooses to treat you in an unacceptable way.
  3. Remember that most relationship difficulties are due to a dynamic between two people rather than one person being unilaterally “bad.” Try not to place blame on yourself or the other person for the negative interactions. It may just be a case of your two personalities fitting poorly.
  4. Try to look for the positive aspects of others, especially when dealing with family, and focus on them. The other person will feel more appreciated, and you will likely enjoy your time together more.
  5. Know when it’s time to distance yourself, and do so. If the other person can’t be around you without antagonizing you, minimizing contact may be key. If they’re continually abusive, it’s best to cut ties and let them know why. Explain what needs to happen if there ever is to be a relationship, and let it go. (If the offending party is a boss or co-worker, you may consider switching jobs.)

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Remember that you don’t have to be close with everyone; just being polite goes a long way toward getting along and appropriately dealing with difficult people. Be sure to cultivate other more positive relationships in your life to offset the negativity of dealing with difficult people.

 

From Elizabeth Scott, M.S.,Your Guide to Stress Management About.com Health’s Disease and Condition

Following exposure to a trauma most people experience stress reactions. When trauma survivors take direct action to cope with their stress reactions, they put themselves in a position of power. Certain actions can help to reduce your distressing symptoms and make things better. Plus, these actions can result in changes that last into the future.

Active Coping. Active coping with the trauma makes you begin to feel less helpless. Active coping means accepting the impact of trauma on your life and taking direct action to improve things. Active coping occurs even when there is no crisis. Active coping is a way of responding to everyday life. It is a habit that must be made stronger.

Positive coping actions.

  • Learn more about trauma and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. It is useful to learn more about common reactions and what is normal. When you learn more you realize that you are not alone or weak.
  • Talk to others for support. It is important not to isolate yourself.
  • Distract yourself with positive activities. Pleasant activities can improve your mood and distract you from your memories.
  • Talk to your doctor or counselor. Part of taking care of yourself means using the helping resources around you. If efforts at coping don’t seem to help, you may become fearful or depressed.

 Practice relaxation methods. Try some different ways to relax, such as:

  • Muscle relaxation exercises.
  • Breathing exercises.
  • Meditation.
  • Swimming, stretching, yoga.
  • Prayer.
  • Listening to quite music.
  • Spending time in nature.

Know the recovery process. Understand that recovering from the trauma is a process and takes time. Knowing this will help you feel more in control.

  • Having an ongoing response to the trauma is normal.
  • Recovery is an ongoing, daily process. It happens little by little. It is not a matter of being cured all of a sudden.
  • Healing doesn’t mean forgetting traumatic events. It doesn’t mean you will have no pain or bad feelings when thinking about them.
  • Healing may mean fewer symptoms and symptoms that bother you less.
  • Healing means more confidence that you will be able to cope with your memories and symptoms. You will be better able to manage your feelings.

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We are here to help if you would like to learn more about coping skills. Whether there is a recent trauma or stress in everyday life, active coping is a habit that can be made stronger.

adhdIs your child unfocused or over active?

Is your child struggling academically?

As an adult, are you constantly disorganized?

Are you constantly struggling to stay on task?

Early diagnosis and treatment can improve self-esteem, build confidence and make one more productive in the workplace.

The staff at Christian Counseling Center is trained in the diagnostic criteria and treatment strategies to assist children and adults with ADD/ADHD.

Call 270.442.5738 for more information and to schedule an appointment.

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Focus on your future today!

 

Thank you for visiting our page. Do you have questions about our Center or how to get counseling? Here are some frequently asked questions.

Why should I have counseling? Anyone who would like to better themselves or enhance their relationships can benefit from counseling. Our therapists have tools that can guide you to improve the way you interact with others at home, at work, and other areas of your life. They also see people who have depression, anxiety, stress, anger issues, substance abuse, or trauma in their life.

Who will I be speaking to? We have 2 licensed therapist and have offices in Paducah, Benton, and Murray. Roger Thompson is our Director. He has a Master’s degree in Psychology and is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Karen Diane Reed has a Master’s Degree in Counseling and is Licensed Professional Counselor.

What can I expect from counseling? The first session we call an Intake or Diagnostic Interview. There is a lot of information gathered at that time about family, health, current issues and goals. The therapist will make an assessment and discuss a plan that meets your needs. Therapy is not a magic cure, and it requires that you are invested in taking steps to achieve your goals.

How much do I pay? Regarding fees, we are in network with many commercial insurance companies and programs available through employers. Your fee would depend on your Mental Health coverage. We also have fees based on income and there is an additional $15 off for self-pay clients paying at the time of service.

When can I make an appointment? At this time we are scheduling about 3 weeks in advance for new clients, but after the initial visit we will do our best to arrange multiple appointments so the wait is not as long in between. Someone is available Monday, Wednesday and Thursday in Paducah; on Tuesday in Benton; and on Friday in Murray.

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If you are struggling with the direction that you are going right now, stop and take the first step in discovering how things can be better. Call our office at 270-442-5738 to make an appointment.

People generally find themselves functioning in one of these ways. When conflict arises people are most naturally either aggressive or passive. Being assertive is a skill that needs to be learning and practiced. Here are the difference in the three with assertiveness being the ideal.

Aggressive behavior is treating another person as if your thoughts, feelings, emotions are more important than theirs.

Passive behavior is treating someone as if their thoughts, feelings, and emotions are less important than others.

Assertive behavior is treating the other person that displays both people’s thoughts, feelings, and emotions at an equal level of importance.

 

Justin P. Lewis, MA, LMFT

A first-born or only child may be more likely to become a doctor or lawyer. Younger siblings more often turn to the arts or the outdoors. In part, you can credit parenting.

  • Parents may over-protect oldests or onlies. So they tend to follow more brain-based interests. When later children show up, parents can be more relaxed and hands-off.
  • Firstborns tend to try to be “perfect” more often than later-borns. But kids without siblings, who are often treated like little adults, seem to have even more of this trait.
  • 21 out of 23 of the first American astronauts were first born. All seven of the original Mercury astronauts were firstborns. Other famous firstborn trail-blazers: Winston Churchill, Bill Gates, JFK, and Oprah Winfrey.
  • It’s lonely at the top — or at least, at the beginning! A 2007 survey of corporate leaders found that 43% of CEOs were firstborns, 33% were middle children, and 23% were youngest children.200485798-009
  • Even when parents try to be even-steven, it rarely works out that way. Kids born first get as much as 3,000 more hours of quality time with parents than younger siblings do at the same age. Parents spend about equal time with two or more kids. But there’s less total free time than there was when a firstborn passed through a given age.
  • It’s clear why birth order interests us so much. Most of us weren’t born as the only child in a family.
  • Older moms say they feel closest to their “babies” no matter what the family size or spacing between kids. In the same study, mothers said firstborns were the ones they’d turn to when facing personal problems or a crisis.

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